A warm interview and a reassuring profile can be a promising start, but they cannot tell you how someone responds when an older person is anxious, a routine changes, or a family member needs an urgent update. Knowing how to verify caregiver references gives you a clearer picture of the person who may become part of your household and your loved one’s daily life.

Reference checking is not about trying to catch a caregiver out. Done well, it is a respectful conversation that confirms experience, reliability and suitability for the particular support your family needs. It also gives former employers the opportunity to describe the caregiver’s strengths in real-life terms.

Start with the care needs, not a generic checklist

Before you call anyone, be clear about the role. A caregiver who is excellent with companionship, meal preparation and light homemaking may not have the experience or confidence needed for personal care, dementia support, transfers or post-operative recovery.

Write down the practical duties, expected hours, level of supervision and the qualities that matter most. Perhaps your father needs someone patient with repeated questions. Perhaps your partner needs reliable assistance with bathing and medication prompts. Perhaps your family needs a caregiver who can communicate calmly with several relatives.

This focus helps you ask references questions that are fair and relevant. It also prevents you from treating a positive reference as proof that a person is right for every care situation.

Ask for relevant, recent referees

Request at least two professional references where possible, preferably from recent care roles. A previous client, family member, care supervisor or coordinator can all provide useful insight. For a caregiver with limited formal work history, a volunteer supervisor or a person who has observed their care work closely may be appropriate, but be open about the difference.

Ask the caregiver for each referee’s full name, relationship to them, telephone number, email address and the dates of the role. A genuine candidate should understand why this step matters. They should also have permission from the referee to share their details.

Do not rely only on written testimonials or screenshots. These can be helpful background, but a direct conversation allows you to ask follow-up questions and understand the context behind broad statements such as “kind”, “hard-working” or “trustworthy”.

Confirm you are speaking to the right person

Before discussing the candidate, introduce yourself, explain that the caregiver has named them as a referee and confirm their relationship to the role. If a referee uses a personal number or email address, that is not automatically a concern, particularly in private household employment. Still, take sensible steps to verify that they are who they say they are.

You might ask how they know the caregiver, where the care took place and when they worked together. Their answers should align with the caregiver’s CV or profile. Small differences in dates may be innocent, but major inconsistencies deserve a calm, direct conversation with the candidate.

Have a respectful reference conversation

Set aside ten to fifteen minutes for each call. Let the referee know that you are looking for an honest view, including whether the role had challenges. People often give more useful answers when they know you are not expecting perfection.

Rather than asking only, “Was the caregiver good?”, use questions that invite specific examples. Consider asking:

• What support did the caregiver provide, and how often did they work?
• How did they build trust with the person receiving care?
• Were they dependable with timekeeping, shifts and communication?
• How did they respond when plans changed or a problem arose?
• Would you feel comfortable employing them again for a similar role?

Follow the answer, not just the script. If a referee says the caregiver was “very patient”, ask for an example. If they mention strong communication, ask how the caregiver kept the family informed. Specific experiences are more meaningful than general praise.

For personal care roles, you may also ask about dignity, consent and respect for privacy. For households where dementia, frailty or disability is involved, ask whether the caregiver remained calm, used appropriate reassurance and recognised when to seek help from a family member or health professional.

Listen for reliability as well as kindness

Compassion is central to good care, but dependable care also requires practical judgement. A reference should help you understand whether a caregiver arrives as agreed, follows household routines, communicates absences promptly and maintains appropriate professional boundaries.

Ask whether the caregiver accepted feedback and adapted to changing needs. Care arrangements often evolve. A person recovering from surgery may become more independent, while someone living with dementia may require greater structure over time. A caregiver who can listen, report concerns and adjust respectfully can make a significant difference to family confidence.

It is also reasonable to ask how the caregiver handled confidential information. They should not discuss personal details casually with neighbours, friends or other families. At the same time, a referee may not be able to share every detail of a previous client’s health or household. Respect that limit.

Check the whole picture, not one conversation

A strong reference is valuable, but it is one part of a careful selection process. Compare what you hear with the caregiver’s work history, qualifications, availability and your own interview impressions. If the role involves specialised support, confirm that they have relevant training or experience rather than assuming it from a general care background.

Reference checks do not replace other sensible safeguards. Depending on the role and your circumstances, you may need identity verification, right-to-work checks, criminal record screening where appropriate, qualification checks and clear emergency contacts. These checks should be conducted lawfully, fairly and with the caregiver’s knowledge and consent.

For families using a care-access platform, a well-completed caregiver profile, stated standards of conduct and structured communication can provide additional reassurance. At CCAC, care seekers can use profiles and direct communication to assess practical fit before agreeing arrangements, while still taking time to verify the experience that matters to their household.

When a referee is difficult to reach

People are busy, travel frequently and may be caring for someone themselves. Leave a concise message with your name, the caregiver’s name and a suitable time to call back. Do not include sensitive information about your relative in a voicemail or email.

If you cannot reach a referee after reasonable attempts, tell the candidate and ask whether they can provide another contact. Avoid jumping to conclusions. A former employer may have changed numbers, moved away or simply be unavailable. What matters is whether the caregiver responds openly and helps resolve the gap.

Know the red flags, but keep an open mind

A reference process should feel consistent and transparent. Be cautious if a candidate refuses to provide any referees without a clear reason, gives contacts who cannot explain the care role, or provides details that repeatedly conflict with their account.

Other concerns include referees who only offer vague praise, unexplained gaps in work history, dismissive attitudes towards confidentiality, or reports of poor communication and missed shifts. One concern does not always mean a caregiver is unsuitable. There may have been a personality clash, illness, a family emergency or a mismatch between expectations. Give the caregiver a chance to explain before making a decision.

The more serious issue is a pattern: information that does not add up, repeated unreliability or conduct that could compromise a person’s safety, dignity or finances.

Put expectations in writing before care begins

Even an excellent reference cannot prevent misunderstandings if the role is unclear. Once you choose a caregiver, agree the schedule, duties, pay arrangements, communication preferences and boundaries in writing. Be specific about what support is and is not expected, who can make decisions, how medication concerns should be reported and what to do in an emergency.

A short introductory period can be helpful, especially where care needs are complex or your loved one is uncertain about accepting support. Check in regularly with both the caregiver and the person receiving care. Ask simple questions: Do they feel respected? Is the routine working? Is anything causing worry?

Trust grows through consistent actions. A thoughtful reference check gives you a strong starting point, but the most reassuring care relationship is built when expectations are clear, communication remains kind and everyone involved feels heard.